TOOL welcomes more couples into the married spirituality movement |
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Written by PAT TODAK, Special to the Chronicle
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Friday, 02 January 2009 01:00 |
TOLEDO—Once a month, John and Rosalind Needham join together with five other couples to share a potluck meal and then laugh and maybe even cry about the highs and lows of their previous month.
Sound like just another group of old friends spending an evening together? It is, but there’s more.
Besides enjoying a meal and stories, the couples pray together, discuss a book or Scripture passage they’ve all read and share prayer intentions.
These couples are part of Teams of Our Lady (TOOL), an international movement of married couples with the purpose of fostering spiritual growth.
The Needhams are members of Toledo Team Two, one of 11 teams located in the northern Ohio area, which includes teams from the Toledo area, New Cleveland and Aurora, Ohio. Although the Needhams are members of Toledo Our Lady of Lourdes, their team couples also include members of Rossford All Saints and Sylvania St. Joseph.
The Needhams’ team has been meeting 10 months a year for the past eight years. During that time Mrs. Needham says she has seen a great deal of growth among the couples in their team.
"You get very close to each other," she says. "We feel free to discuss our innermost feelings. They are a great support to us.
"We share the same values," she adds. "The same hopes and dreams of getting each other to heaven. It’s not often you can do this in our society."
But TOOL is much more than just monthly meetings with other couples. Members of TOOL are asked to commit to daily individual, couple and family prayer. They are also asked to regularly read and reflect on Scripture and hold monthly husband and wife discussions of family and spiritual matters. Mrs. Needham says she and her husband enjoy being part of these "endeavors" or responsibilities as they’re referred to by TOOL.
Mrs. Needham says being part of TOOL has not only improved communication between her and her husband, but also their respect for each other. "It has been very good for our marriage personally," she says.
Currently the Needhams’ team has just started discussing a new book, "Everything Belongs" by Richard Rohr. Mr. Needham believes discussing the readings beforehand as a couple helps strengthen the group meetings.
Although the Needhams have been married 43 years and their children are all grown, many of the teams in northern Ohio consist of younger couples with small children.
Mike and Kristy Catalano from Maumee St. Joseph have three children, age 4 and under, with a fourth on the way. The couple cherishes their time in Team Five, not only because of the spiritual aspects, but because it gives them a chance to spend some adult time with likeminded couples.
"We focus a lot on our kids," says Mrs. Catalano. "It (TOOL) gives us the opportunity to get out in a healthy environment and meet with other people who are focusing on Christ." Team Five has been in existence for two years.
An extremely busy mom, Mrs. Catalano appreciates that being in TOOL compels her and her husband to take time from their hectic schedules to focus on their spirituality.
"Because we have a study topic, it forces my husband and I to read our study topic and answer questions so we have to talk about faith rather than have the world get the better of us."
Mrs. Catalano says their decision to join Teams of Our Lady came from a desire to focus more on their faith.
"It has given us an opportunity to talk to each other about Christ and the difference we want to make in our marriage, our family and our world."
Each team in TOOL has a spiritual counselor, usually a priest, who guides them. Most attend the monthly meetings with the couples.
In addition to meeting monthly in their own team, the teams from northern Ohio gather annually for a retreat.
Teams of Our Lady began in France in 1947, and has spread worldwide. It reached the United States in 1958. The movement is officially recognized by the Holy See as a lay institute under the Pontifical Council for the Laity.
The TOOL Web site notes the movement is for solid, sacramental, growing marriages. The organization states that while all marriages struggle at times, TOOL is not for ìtroubledî marriages. It notes programs such as Retrouvaille are a better choice for couples whose marriages are experiencing difficulties.
Likewise, Teams of Our Lady notes what makes them different from groups such as Renew and Christ Renews His Parish is that Teams of Our Lady emphasizes couples growing in married spirituality.
The Needhams serve as the sector couple for the Northern Ohio Teams of Our Lady. "We’re always welcoming and always wish to expand," Mrs. Needham says. An established team helps to pilot a new team, she says, which takes about nine months.
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Married couples interested in starting a team can contact the Needhams at 419-868-7000 or the Catalanos at 419-841-2824 or kristy.catalano@bex.net.
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Last Updated on Tuesday, 03 March 2009 13:39 |
