TIFFIN—“You make me feel stupid!”

“You always take his side when we have an argument!”

“You never listen to me!”

This style of communication is prevalent in our culture, says Jeff Brown, executive director of Compassionate Communication of Central Ohio.

“Our common communication style guarantees that we will be alienated,” Mr. Brown says. “We have a dualistic mindset that sees everything in terms of good and bad, right and wrong. That’s the genesis of life-alienating communication. Rather than speaking our wants and needs, we speak them indirectly through our images of others’ wrongness. So, we stimulate alienation.”

To help change this, Mr. Smith is presenting a workshop on nonviolent, compassionate communication Sept. 30-Oct. 1 at St. Francis Spirituality Center in Tiffin. The workshop is to be a hands-on practicing of the principles of compassionate communication.

Perhaps it seems obvious, the meaning and characteristics of nonviolent communication (NVC). But it is not just the absence of overt violence that characterizes compassionate communication, Mr. Brown says.

“Compassionate communication brings two elements into the mix. The first is very clear and specific language skills that help us to express how we feel and helps us see others’ humanity,” he says. “The second is a set of underlying principles that show us the way we can live as God would want us to live, that help us see the divine energy in the other so that we begin to see how we all share the same needs, how we all are connected.”

The organization’s website defines nonviolent or compassionate communication as a “learnable process for creating emotional freedom, self-acceptance, inner peace and fulfilling relationships. It involves expressing ourselves honestly, listening with empathy, and developing a more compassionate inner relationship.”

Mr. Brown has been a certified trainer with the Center for Nonviolent Communication since 2005, and has led trainings in 18 states and five countries. He is also an associate trainer with the Non-Violent Communications Training Institute.

While the workshop has specific goals in mind, Mr. Brown stresses it will be experiential and engaging.

“We teach 10 empathy blockers that break down connections, and then we teach an antidote to that, which is deep, nonjudgmental listening. We demonstrate it and then let people practice it,” he says.

By the end of the workshop, Mr. Brown hopes attendees will have learned to:
• hear difficult messages without taking them personally,
• prevent misunderstandings by clearly expressing themselves,
• transform anger before it leads to regrettable actions,
• inspire confidence by creating win/win situations,
• discover the human needs that motivate us to make effective choices,
• form meaningful relationships with friends, co-workers and family members, and
• overcome cultural conditioning that promotes violence.

The workshop is to be conducted in the auditorium of Elizabeth Schaefer Apartments. The program is from 6:30-8:30 p.m. Sept. 30 and 9:30 a.m. to 4:45 p.m. Oct. 1. A donation of $30 per person is requested.

For more information and registeration, contact Martie Aiello at maiello@tiffinfranciscans.org or 419-443-1485.